I do my best to make each of my columns as funny as possible. But the fiscal crisis of California is no laughing matter. This Tuesday, Californians will vote on issues that directly impact the state’s economic present and future. Among the items on the ballot are two propositions that make up the California Balanced […]
Author Archives: Jerry Pfohl
A Dream House without Ken comes as no surprise
President Bush’s proposal to promote “healthy marriages” did not come quickly enough for one couple. After 43 years together, Ken and Barbie have sadly broken up. Mattel’s vice president of marketing, Russell Arons, hints the split is likely due to Ken’s reluctance to finally settle down and get married. Had Bush’s $1.5 billion initiative meant […]
Excessive hype surrounds halftime show
They couldn’t cover a nipple, so now the people at CBS are covering their butts. This year’s Super Bowl featured one of the most shocking happenings in the history of the event ““ the Carolina Panthers actually beat the point spread. Equally outrageous was the championship game’s halftime show in which Justin Timberlake exposed Janet […]
Democratic candidates’ chances slim
Congratulations, John Kerry, it appears you will be the one earning the honor of losing to President Bush in this year’s election. Come November, an all too common question heard around Washington will be, “Hey, John, why the long face?” Tuesday’s New Hampshire primary gave the Massachusetts senator his second political victory in as many […]
Offbeat news makes for colorful holiday season
It seems news does not take a holiday vacation. As finals ended last quarter and UCLA turned into a veritable ghost town, several important events unfolded for the world to see. So many, in fact, that I thought I would dedicate my first column of 2004 to reviewing some of these major stories. So without […]
State’s future lies in capable hands
Arnold Alois Schwarzenegger is not just gubernatorial; he is uber-natorial! Monday’s inauguration officially started a bold new chapter in California’s history. Behind us are the days of the “Just for Men Hair Gel” recall election. “Just for Men” ““ the hair gel that got the Gray out. This new beginning comes at a troubling time, […]
Machines peeved, threaten humanity
Movies have long taught us what to fear. I personally have been scared to death of great white sharks ever since that suspenseful movie “Mary Poppins.” However, the opening of “The Matrix: Revolutions” last week, along with the DVD release of “Terminator 3,” have brought a very critical question back into discussion. This quandary is […]