UCLA is the entire world for many of us. We eat and sleep here, we rarely leave and we stubbornly insist there’s nothing wrong with this. But I have to admit that when I haven’t eaten real food or conversed with anyone over age 25 in months, there is something wrong. With this in mind, […]
Author Archives: Jeff Schenck
The best way to stop STDs: Use your brain
This story never happens. This story ends with our imaginary character, Man, having unsafe sex. Though you think you’re above unsafe sex, we all know sex trumps brains. OK, Man thinks he’s above unsafe sex too. Because of this, when he goes out to parties, he takes friends as companions instead of condoms. Man is […]
City shouldn’t sell gay marriage records
I write a column. You read it. That’s a natural connection to make. San Francisco sells a list of the gay couples who got married there before the California Supreme Court halted the practice. Someone bad and evil buys it and uses it to instigate hate crimes against gay couples. That too is a natural […]
Copyright laws elicit unfair reader prices
Imagine yourself in a world where copyright laws are taken way too far. A world in which you can’t play your CD for a friend. A world in which the childhood game of copycat can land you in jail. A world in which graffiti is protected as intellectual property. A world in which a puny […]
Airwaves should stay clear of political bias
Dear Indie 103.1, I was going to make a request, maybe to play some HorrorPops or Modest Mouse. But I realized that wasn’t what I really wanted. Actually, I’d rather request that Indie 103 be truly independent. After all, we wouldn’t want impressionable children taking the name too seriously, when the station is in fact […]
U.S. exports spread obesity around the world
The young man in Manila ordered a Spamburger and a side of Caesar salad with Spam. A victim of American global marketing, he was eating at the world’s first Spam restaurant, Spamjam. And I find it disgusting. Mainly because Spam is the Ann Coulter of meat products, but also because this restaurant is in the […]
Topple the tower of stress during finals
Correction Appended When I got back from class on Friday, I saw a mess of chairs, tables and trash cans piled up to the ceiling in my study lounge. I thought to myself, what are these meddling kids up to this time? That’s when I realized that the pile was the illegitimate child of finals […]