Famed film festival canned by American pop icons

It was a good day for the underground. After saving the world from an Inner Circle plot involving the conclusion of the latest “American Idol,” the Matrix and an asteroid named Mister Rogers, I felt that it was time for a vacation. Christy, my common-law wife and kung-fu sex-kitten, suggested catching the tail-end of the […]

Inner Circle’s asteroid plot unplugged in the Matrix

With the conclusion of “American Idol” all but sure to bring about the end of civilization, I decided drastic measures would be necessary. Rupert Murdoch’s nefarious Inner Circle was using all the phone votes and text messages to hurtle an asteroid, named for recently deceased public TV guru Mister Rogers, toward earth via the FOX […]

Data points out danger of “˜American Idol’ outcome

The TV executives seemed to be getting trickier than ever, and I thought it necessary to look up my previous college roommate and math-whiz The Amazing Paul, currently double-majoring in computer science & engineering and economics, for help. I figured if there was anyone capable of connecting Pauly Shore’s cryptic last words to Rupert Murdoch’s […]

Pauly Shore flushes out Circle plot with Mr. Rogers tip

We were finally in at Swastique, the overpriced hot-to-trot West Hollywood dining spot rumored to be the home base of operations for Rupert Murdoch’s dastardly TV Inner Circle. Posing as valets, our employee jackets gave my kung-fu kitty common-law wife Christy, The Anarchist and me free reign to scour the place for clues about the […]

Is Inner Circle to blame for B-list actors’ law-breaking?

On the way to posing as valets at some posh, over-pretentious Hollywood eatery, The Anarchist, my kung-fu kitty common-law wife Christy and I stopped off at a liquor store on North Genesee Avenue. “I need to check out the headlines,” I told them as I jumped out of The Anarchist’s classic El Camino. I wanted […]

Dressed to park cars, Circle-pursuers advance

The Day of Reckoning drew ever closer. With the help of the jittery and elusive Anarchist, my common-law wife Christy and I were getting closer to toppling Rupert Murdoch and his Inner Circle of TV executives. The Anarchist promised his Secret Weapon, and he delivered, pulling out three impeccable white and blue blazers. “What are […]