For years, I’ve been complaining about the Pac-10’s inability to reach a deal with ESPN in basketball to put its games on the nation’s most-watched sports network. I thought it was especially important this year, considering how strong the Pac-10 is overall.
But I changed my mind on Monday night.
UCLA fans, count your blessings. You don’t have to put up with Dick Vitale calling your games.
Vitale, for those of you who don’t know, is the most famous basketball announcer in the country. He is also known for being eccentric and extremely energetic, and for ending sentences with “baby!”
But he also has the tendency of being a homer for both teams and coaches, and for going on and on about how good Duke and coach Mike Krzyzewski are, regardless of whether or not Duke is playing.
Before Monday night, all that didn’t bug me too much.
A couple of weeks ago, the Card Chronicle, a Louisville sports blog, kept track of how many people and teams Vitale mentioned other than Louisville and Connecticut, the two teams that were playing that night.
The total came out to 156 ““ extremely high, considering most basketball games last only two hours and there are commercials and a halftime break involved. Among the people Vitale mentioned were Eva Longoria, Rosie O’Donnell and his grandchildren.
I laughed, but didn’t really believe it. So on Monday night, during the Texas-Texas A&M game, a big game featuring two ranked teams, I set out on my own quest to keep track of how many times Vitale got off topic.
By halftime, I had a headache.
He was irritating. Texas and Texas A&M were actually playing good, exciting basketball, but you couldn’t tell by listening to Vitale.
At halftime, about 50 minutes into the broadcast, Vitale had mentioned 67 people or teams that had nothing to do with the game I was watching. He didn’t name drop too many non-basketball celebrities (the only one I caught was Bo Derek), but did name two presidents (George H. W. Bush and Ronald Reagan) and virtually everyone important in the basketball world.
Duke. Kryzyzewski. North Carolina. Gonzaga. UCLA. John Calipari. Bob Huggins. Bill Self. Bobby Knight.
On and on and on and on.
I seriously couldn’t take it anymore.
I muted the second half, recording it in case I ever wanted to revisit this project.
I don’t know how fans of teams other than Duke put up with Vitale calling their games ““ especially those who aren’t traditionally great. He doesn’t talk about the game. And he’s in love with every prominent coach in the country.
If anything, I have proof of concept. Assuming Vitale name-dropped at the same rate in the second half, that’s 134 for the Texas-Texas A&M game, which is less than, but similar to the 156 counted by the Card Chronicle.
The Fox Sports guys may not be perfect or even well known, but they at least talk about the game. Then again, you can say the same about the ESPN announcers other than Vitale.
UCLA fans, you should be thankful. Consider it a blessing in disguise that ESPN frequently seems to forget about the Bruins. Because it could be worse. We could be stuck with Vitale talking about how good Duke is while Arron Afflalo hits the game-winning shot against USC tonight.
E-mail Quiñonez at gquinonez@media.ucla.edu if you like Vitale less than Wyoming.