I guess it’s time to embrace another Bruin-y year. Not that any of them are really ever that similar, but there is a certain pattern of events to look out for every year at UCLA. We have our big college events, our finals, and then we end it with lots of underwear ““ which might be a dead tradition if university police has its way.
However, wound around the folds of these well-publicized events are goings-on that fly below the radar. I recently came across a declaration in “Shame,” a novel by Salman Rushdie, “To unlock a society, look at its untranslatable words.” It’s the same with UCLA. Here are my untranslatable experiences you have to go through before the year ends.
1. This is not for the weak of heart or conservative of mind. Last year on the anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the hotly contested abortion case, Bruin Walk was definitely the place to be. I hope those people come back this year because last time they passed out tiny free rubber fetuses ““ a black one and a white one ““ to show us what abortion really means. Mostly, the group succeeded in creeping everyone out and then, as is the case with anything mass-produced, ended up desensitizing the students.
The strategy was probably meant to be sensational, but it was an amusing sight to see everyone walking away from Bruin Walk awkwardly holding onto two small fetuses. In addition to the screaming and the exhibitionist strategies of both sides, Jan. 22 also shows off the most colorful characters of the Bruin population, and it’s something you can’t miss. Besides, this could be the year of free placentas or something.
2. This particular item requires a strong resolve and a very high tolerance for pain. UCLA Dance Marathon is an amazing fundraiser, and every year, it raises enormous sums of money to aid in the fight against pediatric AIDS. I wholeheartedly support the end result, but it’s the means that I have issues with.
My second year I was at the pill table during Dance Marathon, standing in line for painkillers that would numb every raw nerve and muscle I had. I am all for donating to the cause, but personally, jiggling up and down in a boxlike room for 26 hours is more than I can deal with. If you are up for the event, I say go for it.
But is anyone else in my camp of weaklings? You’ve been warned. It is difficult to walk past the cheery neon shorts and the DM committee (which is always aesthetically above average), but everyone has a different role in the fight against pediatric AIDS. I happen to be a donor and choose to forego the painful dance.
3. There is no way and no point in avoiding the election this year. So I say embrace the whole thing and let go of the “disenfranchised youth of America” persona. I really want to go to a political rally this quarter. Last year, UCLA played host to Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Gray Davis and Oprah so it’s safe to say that this future rally is probably going to be for Sen. Obama. Whether politically engaged or not, you can feel as smug and aware as other Bruins who go through the same experience.
Plus it’s a good story to mentally tuck away when you have to make small talk at a future job interview when someone mentions college activism. Of course this is a purely hypothetical situation, because considering the floundering beast that is the economy right now, we are probably not going to get anywhere near an interview. Or a job. At least after standing through a rally, we can say we were a tiny part of the effort for a possible solution.
4. There is really no substitute for the wee hours of Powell. I have only experienced the night library a few times, but the host of character has always been captivating. Procrastinators and under-pressure heroes unite under the harsh glare of tube lights, taking turns to curl up in exhaustion on the couches. Enough students are busy glaring at computer screens and textbooks to make you forget that there is a whole other world outside.
The usual haze of cigarette smoke on the Powell Library steps hangs thicker in the night air, and bludgeoned by the weight of organic chemistry or Byzantine history, you guiltily start understanding how Ray Bradbury was able to write his masterpiece about book-burning in this library. If you’ve ever wondered what a love-hate relationship would feel like, frequent Powell between dusk and dawn.
E-mail Joshi at rjoshi@media.ucla.edu if you still have your rubber fetus. Send general comments to viewpoint@media.ucla.edu.