“˜Pop’ culture keeps “˜snap crackle’ even during finals

Anthony Bromberg abromberg@media.ucla.edu

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So, my week like, sucks.

How about yours?

First off I have to go to class, which is just a huge bummer
because I almost never go to class. Learning about
ultra-intellectual stuff like Japanese cinema and the Beatles just
isn’t worth my time, but apparently you have to pass these
kinds of things if you don’t want to get kicked out of school
(and if that happened I wouldn’t get to write for The Bruin
and then where would I be?).

So, instead of doing what I wanted to do this week I’m
screwed. Tragedy.

Can you believe that instead of watching the MTV Movie Awards, I
have to write a paper about four goofy-looking losers from across
the Atlantic Ocean who got famous because they shook their heads
and said “yeah, yeah, yeah.” Anyone can do that, and
we’re not all bitching about being famous and having classes
about ourselves. I mean, really, what do they want from me? So the
paper, right, that’s just really not fair. I mean I heard
that Jack Black and Sarah Michelle Gellar fight onstage and Buffy
kicks Tenacious D’s ass. And what if the cast of
“Moulin Rouge” and “The Lord of the Rings”
win all of the awards and then during the press conference Kylie
Minogue and Liv Tyler make out. Damn, I’m going to cry if I
miss that.

I was also going to go see “Star Wars Episode II”
for the third time in the theaters with digital projection last
night. But instead of getting to hang out with my roommates and
convince my girlfriend to watch Yoda’s badass fight scene, I
had to rent a movie with subtitles. That meant instead of making
lightsaber noises in my head during the movie I had to read.

The worst thing is though ““ and if you’re sensitive,
I’m not really sure you should keep reading, in fact, really
stop as this might be too painful, well don’t say I
didn’t warn you, really it’s a pity, it’s going
to break your little heart into a million pieces ““ I missed
the Britney Spears concert. You don’t need to do a double
take, you can indeed believe it, I missed the Britney Spears
concert.

Now, I mean, there aren’t many things that mean so much to
me that I feel like it’s a total and major injustice if I
don’t get to see them. And well, I, guess, because of her
earth-shattering dance moves and wailing vocal chords I just feel
like the current young Queen of Pop just emblematizes everything
that’s important to me.

She is the epitome of pop culture. She is the high priestess of
the state of current affairs in the world right now, a virtual
ambassador of goodwill, good acting, good looks and nice tunes to
the world. Her concert would probably change my life, and I think
this is the point in the article where I ask her if I can
““

Hold on a second or something. Sorry, “Elimidate”
came on and then “Rendez-View.” So, I was saying
““

Phew, for a minute there I lost myself. I think.

I think I was getting confused. I think my priorities might have
been getting mixed up. Maybe, my pop culture lifestyle is void of
meaning and significance. But then again, why shouldn’t it
be?

I mean my classes at an institution of higher learning are on
movies and the Beatles. What other evidence do you need that pop
culture is valid to the study of human existence? In fact at this
point in time, it’s difficult to picture the world,
especially the U.S. and especially L.A., not being defined by pop
culture. Of course, pop stands for popular, so perhaps by
definition we’re always immersed in the popular culture, but
the current phenomenon seems to go beyond that.

Why shouldn’t it though? It’s finally getting hot
outside and people certainly seem to think they have their share of
problems, so why not create a surreal world where we can escape to?
A world of glamour and cocaine, a world of excess and hyperbole, a
world of silliness and nonsense, a world where both Mister Rogers
and David Hasselhoff are possible ““ that is the world a lot
of us think we would like to live in. So, if we waste, errr, sorry,
utilize our college careers to the fullest by becoming a mush of
pop culture gooeyness then ““ hold on I think a guy from the
last “Survivor” is walking by my window…

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