Hate confrontation in Westwood sparks revelation

Thursday, May 30, 1996

A family’s racist remarks can’t be seen as AmericanBy Glenn K.
Oyoung

When my girlfriend, Carol, asked me to drop her off at Freddy
and Liana’s, the hair salon on Broxton, I sighed. I don’t like
being a chauffeur, but so it goes with boyfriendly duty, right? I
dropped her off and parked in Lot 32.

This is where the real fun begins. I walked over to the hair
salon and let Carol know that I was going to Copelands to look for
an Adidas T-shirt. Picture this: One young Asian male on a search
for a T-shirt is walking north on Broxton. What did I see headed
towards me?

Four Caucasian individuals, a family. One middle-aged mom, one
middle-aged dad, a son in his 20s and a son who is 17 or 18. I
noticed them, they noticed me. So far, so good. A typical day in
Westwood, right? Wrong.

As they pass the Asian sushi restaurant, they start making those
ANNOYING, JUVENILE sounds, mocking Asian language. "Ching-chong!
Mar-far! Chong-hi!"

I’ve put up with this crap all my life, and it never ceases to
amaze me that hicks around the country seem to have a knee-jerk
chemical reaction that takes part in their so-called "brains." It
goes something like this: See anything Asian (or O-rient-al as
these cultured people know us), then spend 10 or 15 minutes making
up really intellectual statements like "Ching-Chong!" I could train
monkeys to do the same.

Usually I would have just kept walking. But as I continued
towards them, the young one remarked, "You don’t ever want to eat
that GOOK food." That was a mistake.

"That was real fucking funny," I growled as I passed them. I
could have just shrugged off this family as yet another example of
the ugly side of America, but without thinking, I continued.

"Gook food? I’m not American to you, am I?!?!?" I asked
them.

No reply. I guess they didn’t expect a weak, meager, colored boy
to question their ignorance. Or maybe they didn’t think I could
speak "English."

"Answer me! I’m not American, am I?" I was in their face now.
Still no answer.

"Come on! ANSWER ME! I’m not American to you, right?!?!?" The
people on the street were looking at me; the shop owners were
coming to watch. "ANSWER ME!" Then, a quiet "No … no you’re not
American."

"WHY? BECAUSE I HAVE SLANTED EYES! ­ I’m Asian, I have
slanted eyes ­ that’ s why I’m not American right?!? ANSWER ME
you BIGOT!! !!"

" … yeah."

"YEAH WHAT?!!? SAY IT ­ SAY I’M NOT AMERICAN BECAUSE OF MY
EYES YOU FUCKING BIGOT! SAY IT! SAY IT!!!!"

They were in shock. They couldn’t believe that a colored boy was
standing up to them ­ they probably didn’t even think that
they were wrong. That’s what pissed me off.

" … you’re not American," the boy said in a voice above a
whisper. All I wanted in the beginning was an apology and then we
would all be on our way. But I couldn’t believe that they actually
saw nothing wrong in their view. Human nature is a pathetic thing
sometimes. "Do you REALLY believe that? Do you!!?!?!"

His eyes never met mine. Even bigots know shame.

They started walking away. "SAY IT LOUDER! SAY IT SO EVERYONE
CAN HEAR YOU" I yelled. They were walking faster. "Tell me I’m not
American because I’m Asian."

"He’s still coming," said the father. He couldn’t believe that a
crazy little Chink had the nerve to confront him. "Don’t walk away
­ I’m not even American. WHY ARE YOU WALKING AWAY YOU
BIGOTS!?!?!?!?! YOU FUCKING COWARDS!!!!!"

They were far away now, but I was following them. Inside, I
wanted them to be sorry they ever saw me. The big son (he was three
times my size) turned as if he wanted to throw me down. Fine. I’m
no Jackie Chan, but my kung-fu isn’t that bad … I wanted him to
start something, even with the cops around. I stared him down, and
they kept walking. And my yelling continued; I berated them as they
scurried around the comer.

"You should have killed those assholes," a shop owner said to
me, as he patted me on my shoulder. Still caught in the
fight-or-flight (in this case, fight) rage, I tried to find them.
They were long gone.

The sad thing I’ve learned from my past is that they are never
long gone. These incidents live on in the minds of any person who
is harassed because of their appearance or identity. This applies
to everyone, people of all colors, people of different genders, of
different sexual orientations. That family is off somewhere
laughing about the time a crazy dish-washing Gook followed them,
yelling. I will always remember how heavy my heart was when they
were gone.

A funny thing happens when you confront people like these. They
back down. They walk away. If you stand up to cowards, they break.
I’m smart enough to know that I didn’t change the minds of anyone
in that family. They won’t pass another Asian restaurant and
comment, "Look, Thurston … what a marvelous example of the long
history and prolific culture of the Chinese civilization." But I’ll
guarantee you that they’ll think twice before they jibber,
"Ching-Chong, Guam-Bong." again.

We all have to make a choice in life. Do we cower in the face of
ignorance, or do we stand up for ourselves? Racism is real. Thien
Ly, a UCLA alumnus, is dead because he was nothing more than a
"Jap" to the white supremacists who kicked his head in and cut him
until he was gone forever. There are more important things than
your future career, than lowering your cars, than how loud you can
make your muffler … If we remain silent, how will we ever be
anything more than "gooks," "jiggers," "dykes"???

The fact is, I am American. I think that Caucasian family forgot
that they are every bit the immigrant that I am. If anything, my
gratefulness and pride in everything that America has to offer
makes me more American than those bigots will ever be. America is
about tolerance, equality ­ the thing that makes America great
is our diversity.

I grew up believing in America. I believe that differences are
good. If my slanted eyes preclude me from being a "true American"
like the "true American" family I encountered tonight, then I don’t
want to have anything to do with their America.

But I know better than they, and I am writing this to make damn
well sure that this event does some good. America isn’t about
hatred, it isn’t about ignorance, it isn’t about "Ching-Chong."

The thing that pisses me off was that you would think that this
kind of thing wouldn’t happen at UCLA, of all places. So many
Asians around, and this kind of attitude is still alive and well.
Many dismiss this family as a fluke. They were the only bigots dumb
enough to be vocally racist ­ but the worst racism is silent.
One hundred silent Asians will never have the effect of one loud
one. Ignorance, my friends, can’t be ignored. This time, I was the
loud one … would you have been able to do the same?

We are all "real Americans" in my book: black, white, Asian,
Latino, male, female, gay, straight, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist.
We’re all real Americans. Don’t let any cowards take our worth away
with their fear and bigotry. We are American.

… Say it.

Oyoung is a second-year business economics student.

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