Natalie Ray hadn’t heard her name called in a starting
lineup for a long time.
As it reverberated throughout Pauley Pavilion earlier this
month, the crowd let out the loudest cheer of the night. The
injured senior had reached a crossroads in her life, both as a
women’s volleyball player and a person. By making that start
against Cal on Nov. 14, Ray’s first ever as a Bruin, she had
overcome an injury that should have ended her career and threatened
her future health. But perhaps more importantly, her return to the
court provided Ray validation after four arduous years in a Bruin
uniform.
“It’s almost indescribable,” Ray said.
“It’s such a rush to know that you have all that
support and the fans are cheering and your team’s there with
you. Being able to experience that before I leave here was really
special.”
Ray stood off to the side as UCLA received the ball before
coming into the game against the Bears. She served once, took her
turn in the rotation, and then watched the remainder of the game
from the sideline.
Even that turned out better than anyone could have hoped.
“For me, because we’ve been roommates and very good
friends, it was comforting to see her out there” junior
Krystal McFarland said.
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Only one month earlier, nobody in their right mind would have
thought Ray could have ever played volleyball again.
“I didn’t think she was able to come back,”
friend and teammate junior Brittany Ringel said. “From what I
saw when I went down to the hospital to see her, it didn’t
seem like it would be a possibility. Just to see how hard this has
been on her, with school and not being able to finish volleyball, I
was amazed.”
While on a road trip in Washington, Ray began warming up as she
normally would, riding a stationary bike for an hour. But something
was a little different this time. She felt a pain in her right arm
and noticed some swelling. Her arm began to ache, and the pain got
progressively worse. The following Monday, Oct. 6, Ray went to the
emergency room at the UCLA medical center, where they took an
ultra-sound of the arm.
The news wasn’t good.
“I hadn’t even gotten back from the ultrasound and
they admitted me right away,” Ray said. “I didn’t
know it was that intense, but it was pretty bad. When I raised my
arm, I’d lose my pulse.”
She was diagnosed with thoracic outlet syndrome. Due to years of
playing volleyball, her muscles and bone near her right shoulder
area had overdeveloped, and began pinching off a vein. Blood was
clotting up, so much so that by the time Ray checked into the
hospital, she had a frighteningly large four-inch blood clot. She
was immediately put on blood thinners.
“I had these catheters and tubes, one in my forearm and
one near my hip, that were running up through my heart and into my
shoulder,” Ray said. “It was shooting a strong
anti-coagulant medicine, and I was on that for three
days.”
Unfortunately, whenever Ray was taken off the blood thinning
medication, the clots would return. After a few days, her family
and doctors determined that she should undergo surgery. One week
after initially coming to the hospital, Ray had a rib resection:
The rib that was pinching off her nerve was removed. She went home
to San Diego to recover a day after the procedure.
“I went home with a drain coming out of me to drain all
the blood,” she said. “It was pretty gnarly; I had this
big tube in me with a ball on the end of it.”
Ray was able to get through her harrowing circumstances largely
with the support of her family, friends and teammates; they visited
in droves. Nearly her entire team, as well as other Bruin athletes,
checked in on her and tried to lift her spirits.
“The hospital in general is not a very comfortable place
to go, so it meant a lot that they took their time out and come see
me, to know that I had that kind of support,” she said.
“Both times I was there I was very impressed with how
upbeat she was, and I know that that wasn’t always the
case,” her coach, Andy Banachowski, said. “Her attitude
and her resilience have always impressed me.”
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In her first few years at UCLA, Ray wasn’t so sure if she
could impress the coaching staff at all.
She hadn’t come to Westwood specifically to play
volleyball. Ray did always want to be a Bruin ““ but simply as
a student, not necessarily as an athlete. She had sent a letter to
Banachowski and assistant coach Kim Jagd with her high school
stats, in hopes that they could somehow help her get into the
school. She was surprised when they invited her to walk on to the
team.
“My parents and I were in shock,” Ray said.
“Our mouths were wide open. I think it was all
luck.”
But as a walk-on she felt that she wasn’t as respected
““ or rather, that she was not as appreciated ““ as much
as a regular starter. Her lack of playing time caused her to doubt
her role and position on the team, and her first few years as a
Bruin were mentally difficult.
“There were some good times and a lot of bad times
too,” she said. “It’s hard to come here and be so
grateful that you’re a part of it, and yet know that
you’re never going to have a huge role in the playing aspect
of the game. Once I was shown that appreciation verbally, I felt
much better about my position and role on the team. It was good to
know that I was needed.”
Eventually, she came to realize that her role on the team
extended beyond the court. She represented the volleyball team on
the Bruin Athletic Council and was a player who made her greatest
impact in practice, challenging the starters to improve and
motivating her teammates with her intensity and attitude.
“I’m sure there has been some doubt that she’s
gone through. But she’s grown tremendously through the
program,” Banachowski said. “She’s enjoyable and
easygoing and has always been a favorite of her teammates.
That’s a huge contribution she’s made to this
program.
Even after she earned the respect and admiration of her
teammates, she was still struggling for playing time. This season,
however, began promisingly, and Ray was being substituted in much
more frequently. Until, that is, the injury abruptly ended her
season.
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Incredibly, a few weeks later she was back in the gym.
Her recovery had gone so well that it became clear to the
coaching staff that she might be physically ready to participate on
a limited basis in a game. Her body was still weak, and her serves
were barely clearing the 10-foot line in practice.
But with senior night approaching, allowing Ray to start was the
perfect way to acknowledge both the contributions she has made to
the team over her career, as well as her road back from a
debilitating injury.
“I didn’t know that my recovery was going to go so
well and so fast,” she said. “I really didn’t
know what to expect. I thought it was for sure that I was never
going to be able to play, but I was really excited to go in there
and serve.”
And so, merely a month after her hospitalization, Natalie Ray
made her triumphant return to Pauley Pavilion, playing in a game
that she had worked so hard to get back to, for a team that she had
worked so hard to be a part of ““ the culmination of two
divergent roads that had come together for one special moment.