UCLA alumnus Erik Courtney said finding the right person through online dating is as difficult as finding a unicorn.
One of his strangest online dating experiences, Courtney said, occurred when he started flirting in a bar with a nearby girl, assuming she was the girl he’d met online. Like a bad joke, Courtney said his actual date walked in the room, and he apologized to the first girl as she slipped him her number.
Citing this incident as an example, Courtney said he didn’t have much success with online dating. That is, until Courtney later met his future wife, Nadine Jolie Courtney, online and they clicked.
Now they’re starring as a couple in the second season of Bravo’s reality show “Newlyweds: The First Year,” which films couples throughout their first year of marriage. Courtney’s season will debut Tuesday.
Erik, a filmmaker, said that while the show was a surreal experience, the couple had not pursued it on their own but were instead presented with the opportunity; Bravo contacted his wedding coordinator looking for couples. Courtney said he and his wife, an author and blogger, were selected for the show after filling out an application, completing an interview and answering questions.
The Daily Bruin’s Lindsay Weinberg talked with Erik about the couple’s arrival in Japan on their third date, how their fighting was depicted on screen and his interest in the behind-the-scenes of show business.
Daily Bruin: Can you briefly tell me about your relationship?
Erik Courtney: We met on OkCupid, and we basically started messaging each other, which led to a date in West (Los Angeles). We talked for four hours that night. It was a very different date for us; we really shared a lot about who we were, and we connected.
We ended up going to Japan for a week. So literally four days (after the second date), the third time I ever saw her in my life, we hopped on a plane, went straight to LAX of course and went to Japan.
And the rest of the relationship from that point was very whirlwind. I got a couple musicians in Paris to learn how to orchestrate her favorite song. And while were walking along the Seine, I pretended like I was going to take a photo and then have these guys start playing, (and I) got down on one knee and we got engaged.
DB: Why did you two want to be on the show “Newlyweds”?
EC: We thought it would be an amazing opportunity to document our lives. I was in the Producers Program at UCLA so I loved filmmaking and have a real passion for it, so to be around creative documentary filmmakers was cool to me. The idea that we could have a film crew at our wedding, or our first Christmas together, or our first Valentine’s Day, it just seemed fun and also kind of characteristic of the kind of people we are. We like to make big decisions like that and go for the adventure first.
DB: The filming for “Newlyweds” has ended. How did it feel putting your relationship on camera?
EC: What was really interesting about it was the idea of how I came across in those moments when I wasn’t at my best. They give you a camera to keep, they call it the couple cam, and I was super excited about that. They told us, “Film your moments, film your life because we can’t be there for everything.” And they really were pursuing something that was much more documentary than I think traditional realities are. They want real moments; they didn’t want manufactured fights.
So we were having a fight at one point, and Nadine grabbed the camera and started filming me. And that was a very weird moment alone, but watching (the footage) was very interesting to see how I behaved in a fight, to see when I should’ve let it go or when I should’ve apologized. So it was really a great form of couple therapy for us.
DB: Were there times you felt your privacy was invaded during an intimate moment?
EC: Not really because you kind of know what you’re signing up for. If you’re worried about having your privacy invaded, you shouldn’t have signed at the bottom line. You owe them your private moments. It would be wrong to not give them everything that you have. I always felt like I’d let them down somehow, because they’re investing in us too.
DB: Did the show change the dynamic of your relationship?
EC: I would say the first year of marriage has changed the dynamic of our relationship more than the show. You can’t ignore the fact that you’re being filmed, but (we’re) interested in being truthful to ourselves and to each other, that was kind of the basis of our relationship. I feel like we’re very real in terms of who we are, and it would’ve been very hard for the show to transform us. The only way I think it might have is just that it made us more self-aware.
Compiled by Lindsay Weinberg, A&E contributor.