Savages
Directed by Oliver Stone
Relativity Media and Universal Pictures
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Los Angeles has been jam-packed with “Savages” advertisements for what seems like months now. The artfully crafted six-panel poster that features rough- and tough-looking characters has surely drawn the attention of anyone driving by the bus stop or billboards. Face it, the movie looks rugged down to its core.

Unfortunately, the whole thing plays out like a sloppy, poorly written Quentin Tarantino film, and falls short of excellence by a long shot.

“Savages” follows O (short for Ophelia), played by Blake Lively, and her two boyfriends, Ben and Chon, played by Aaron Johnson and Taylor Kitsch, respectively. The duo also happen to be best friends and the biggest growers of marijuana in California. Their marijuana has premium amounts of THC, which is very desirable among distributors of the drug.

Soon enough, this hedonistic Californian trio faces problems from a Mexican cartel. The boys are given a choice: work with the cartel and teach them to grow “primo” herb, or watch Ophelia die a horrible death.

Some of the assassins that work for the cartel are intense, well-developed characters. Benicio del Toro plays Lado, a man with a godly mustache who drives around with his gardening crew and takes care of business by physically dismantling anyone who defies the cartel.

Aaron Johnson, who was a failure of a superhero in the film “Kick-Ass,” plays Ben, a stereotypical stoner from Berkeley with dreadlocks and a soft heart. He is clearly the brains behind their business.

His partner, Chon, is the meathead behind the operation. Physically scarred on the face from fighting across seas in Afghanistan, he is in charge of the violent side of their business.

Blake Lively’s narration becomes horribly obnoxious about halfway through the film, especially when she says twice: “Just because I’m telling you this story doesn’t mean I’m alive at the end of it.” It all felt clumsy and a little forced.

In addition, viewers may literally facepalm when they hear her complain about not having Wi-Fi while being detained by the Mexican cartel. And no, it’s not meant to be a funny scene.

“Savages” has plenty of fun moments that involve violence and gore, sexuality and torture, but it’s the little things that lead to its demise, like sloppy dialogue and embarrassing marijuana puns.

The film also has one of the worst endings imaginable. For such a suave movie poster, the film disappoints big time.

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