It was the winter of 1998, and there were a few things that I hated: spinach, multiplication tables and a guy called Drew Soicher.
My derision toward Soicher ““ an American commentator who provided updates during the Olympics in Nagano, Japan ““ derived from his galling tendency to immediately precede the most exciting events of the Games (which were shown on tape delay in the States) with the results of those events.
Needless to say, any time Soicher made an appearance, we ran screaming from the room or switched channels back to “Melrose Place.”
Thankfully, this winter’s Olympics, which open tonight in Vancouver, will be seen live by viewers on the West Coast and will not be subject to the disclosures of Deep Throaters like Soicher.
That said, the real question at hand is why the Winter Games struggle to gain the passionate support that their Summer counterparts enjoy. Both sessions have been a crucial element of my sports fandom for as long as I can remember, but the consensus among people I’ve talked to is that they can’t really get into the Winter Olympics.
It seems apparent that one of the most logical explanations for this lack of passion is a result of a lack of familiarity with many of the sports that conducted in the Winter Olympiad.
Here at UCLA, perhaps the definitive Southern California locale in terms of climate and culture, people are more inclined to think of the biathlon as a lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender fundraiser rather than a snow sport, and the closest thing we have to the luge is sliding on ice blocks down the Janss hillside.
For me, the obscurity of some of these sports is what makes them so appealing. Sure, it’s nice to see basketball stars, fleet-footed “Lightning” Bolts and swimming potheads in the Summer Games, but you and I can enjoy all of those opportunities recreationally on campus. (No, I am not admitting to Phelpsian bong hits.) In watching the pending Vancouver events, I won’t be able to resist developing a new appreciation for those who effectively execute the skills needed to excel at curling or ski jumping. If I could ever come close to sweeping like those curlers do, my mom would have paid me to stay home, do chores and forgo higher education.
These particular Vancouver Games will provide a number of storylines that will appeal to any casual viewer, particularly of the American variety.
Can skier Lindsey Vonn find the Super-G success to match her super good looks?
Will Bode Miller drown himself in Labatt Blue the night before a gold-medal run?
Will the Colbert Nation-sponsored U.S. speed skating team put on a performance that is Comedy Central material?
Each of these plotlines should, and will, appeal to fans that usually could not care less about Nordics and salchows.
Like any international sporting event, the Winter Games come down to more than just sports. They’re about individual stories of tragedy and triumph, and large-scale tales of uncertainty and unity. I urge you to enjoy that aspect of the spectacle, not in lieu of the sports themselves but in addition to them.
These Games will delight you with their thrills, dispirit you with their heartbreak and dazzle you with their magnificence. Vancouver will put on a two-week show worthy of your viewing and your passion. I am telling you right now, before it has all begun, that that’s what is going to happen. Just call me Drew Soicher.
If you’ve been watching “Miracle” nonstop for the last month, e-mail Eshoff at reshoff@media.ucla.edu.