I have an annual subscription to Cosmopolitan. I know, big surprise.
After being a faithful reader for years, I’d become a little cynical of the content. While I still read it cover to cover every month, I began to understand the common complaint about the magazine having the same content with a different cover model month to month.
However, to my delight and surprise, they have made an addition to their editorial content that goes beyond seemingly unattainable orgasm techniques and beauty tricks: The Cosmo Couple Quiz. More of an activity than an actual test, the Couple Quiz serves as an opportunity to have a few laughs with your significant other and perhaps learn something out of the ordinary about that person.
Peeling his attention away from ESPN’s SportsCenter, I took a chance on this potentially cheesy bonding mechanism with my boyfriend. The outcome was unexpectedly wonderful.
Researchers from The Relationship Gym, a Web site devoted to working out your relationship, say that compatibility is essential for couples to stay happy. Their site says that “the more compatible you are with your partner, the more you will “˜naturally’ get on together.”
It is highly unlikely that you will be fully compatible with anyone on all levels of romantic relationships, which include friendship, sexuality and goals. But, creating a bond with your partner will fill the void that these imperfections leave in compatibility.
The Couple Quiz is a vehicle for this bond.
My boyfriend and I grew up on opposite sides of the socioeconomic spectrum. I have a relatively boring life story, growing up in a typical middle-class suburb with homecoming court crowns and A-plus papers as main elements of my childhood and adolescent memorabilia.
He, on the other hand, grew up in East Los Angeles and has memories of stealing Frosted Flakes as a 6-year-old from a corner liquor store during the 1992 L.A. riots.
While our common passion of dance brought us together, our general compatibility levels are not exactly ideal.
Unless we compensate for our differences through bonding techniques such as the Couple Quiz, we may eventually become a victim of the 52-percent divorce rate currently cited by The Relationship Gym for most developed countries.
With this in mind, my guy and I have made Cosmo’s Couple Quiz a monthly ritual.
The other night, we took the most recent version of the quiz from the June issue. It presented the classic word-association setup: One person says a word and the other responds with the first thing that comes into his head.
I read, “Lips.”
He responded, “Head.”
After a good 10-minute laughing session, endorphins took over, and we finished the quiz with smiles from ear to ear.
Whether or not we will retain the information we learn about each other, and whether or not that information is even relevant or important to our relationship, isn’t really the point of taking the quiz.
The fact of the matter is that it allows a small segment of time ““ something sometimes unheard of in busy relationships nowadays ““ where the focus is completely and solely on each other.
You discuss topics that might never come up in your normal, daily conversations and show another side of yourself in the relationship.
Furthermore, there is a mutual value in undivided attention for both men and women. Although men may not be as literal with their requests for women to listen to them, they still enjoy having someone to share with.
Four months ago, I found out that I’m apparently a Redwood, and my boyfriend is an Oak. Seemingly meaningless information translates to symbolic personality representations similar to those of astrological signs and horoscopes.
Despite the value, or lack thereof, of the information discussed, the time is chalked up to a bonding experience that will likely increase mutual compatibility.
I’m hardly an advocate for renaming each issue of Cosmo “the monthly Bible.”
I do, however, think having some kind of monthly ritual with your significant other can help your relationship go the distance.
Normally filled with advice from people you don’t know, the Couple Quiz section of the magazine allows for an interactive, yet guided, session of bonding.
The outcome is entirely up to the instinctual and ever-so-unpredictable answers of you and yours.
What do you think when you hear “lips”? E-mail Forde atnforde@media.ucla.edu. Send general comments to viewpoint@media.ucla.edu.