These are a few of my favorite months

In case nobody ever told you in middle school, there’s a reason why there are 12 months in a year.

Without the first nine, nobody would ever be adequately prepared for the sports smorgasbord that is September through December.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the best time of the year.

For sports fans, right now is New Year’s, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and your birthday all rolled up and ingested at the same time.

Think about it. There’s no other time of the year that can compare to what this season has to offer.

For baseball fans, the playoff race is at its peak. The Cubs will fall apart in the playoffs in dramatic fashion, the Yankees will go at least one more year without a championship, and the Red Sox will go for their second world title over the past 89 years. Then baseball season will wind down, and for a split second you’ll think about facing the winter with nothing but the sour taste of another season at the bottom of the NL West.

Good thing there’s high school football every Friday night as the nation’s top recruits prove themselves and non-coastal states live and die with the fate of kids’ teams. If nothing else, watching high school football makes you thankful there are higher levels of the sport.

Which brings me to the only thing Saturdays are meant for: watching college football. Games start earlier than people should ever get up ““ that’s 9 a.m. if you’re on the West Coast ““ and every week there is potential for upsets. Fans all over the country fight for the pride of their teams and conference, though sometimes they take it just a little too far. (See: Brian Christopher Thomas ““ a Texas fan nearly castrated in an Oklahoma bar for wearing a Longhorns T-shirt.)

And if you’re a communist and don’t like major league baseball, high school or college football, the NFL is in full swing, and there have been a few surprises already this season, with plenty of promise for more.

As of last week, Frank Gore and the Niners were undefeated along with Detroit, Houston and Green Bay. The Patriots got caught for secretly recording the Jets’ defensive signals, and commissioner Roger Goodell has been more punishing than Michael Vick was with his dogs.

Even in a temporarily Michael Vick-less league, there’s plenty of punch. Just watch Steve Smith, the Bengals offense, the Baltimore defense and Steve Smith some more.

And while the NFL heats up as the weather cools down, there will be some key matchups that will provide entertainment and sports jabber, not to mention playoff implications. New England plays at the Ravens week 13 in a battle of Ray Lewis v. Tom Brady; San Diego will take on the Titans week 14 in what could be a pivotal game for the Chargers; and the Colts will butt heads with the Raiders week 15 in a game that will have absolutely no implications for either team.

Then in the middle of football season, college basketball sneaks up on you like a spider monkey and all of a sudden you’re in the middle of a national title hunt with March Madness in sight.

And at that point, there’s only one thing you can do: Buy Madden ’09, post up on your couch and wait till September rolls around again.

Contact Feder at jfeder@media.ucla.edu if you get bored in the middle of May.

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