Hello, dear reader, and welcome to A&E’s annual
prediction sesh, in which we crack open our fortune cookies and see
what’s going to be in and out in 2007. If you read our
year-end coverage, you know that 2006 was a year to remember, but
now it’s time to move on. We’ve got lots to look
forward to in 2007: the iPhone, the last Harry Potter book and a
new Britney Spe ““ er, Shins album. Get excited.
OUT: Adopting Third World babies
IN: Getting pregnant
More and more celebrities are discovering that going to Malawi
to adopt their kids just ends in tears and bad press, as Madonna
recently found out. But the Material Mom hasn’t been a
trendsetter in decades, and even protege Britney Spears is getting
on the biological bandwagon, cranking out a couple of wee ones with
ex-hubbie Kevin Federline. Angelina Jolie, U.N. ambassador and
well-known baby adopter, finally got knocked up herself. Who wants
to fly to Africa when you have a womb in the comfort of your own
stomach?
OUT: Injuries
IN: “Wiinjuries”
Pulling a hammy while playing basketball or spraining an ankle
running the bases is so played out. In 2007, it’s all about
Nintendo Wii-induced injuries, or as they’ve been so lovingly
named, “Wiinjuries.” Some players get a little too
excited while playing games such as Wii Sports, causing the straps
on their Wii remotes to snap and leading to catastrophes such as
the one pictured here. Nintendo has recalled 3.2 million Wii remote
straps and replaced them with sturdier upgrades, but something
tells us it won’t stop intrepid gamers from finding ways to
injure themselves and their HDTVs.
OUT: “Crash” backlash
IN: “Little Miss Sunshine” backlash
Last year, the “harsh reality” of
“Crash” and the Hollywood Oscar voter stole the Best
Picture statuette from the more-deserving gay cowboys of
“Brokeback Mountain.” In 2007, the rockin’
script-driven indie hit “Little Miss Sunshine” is the
overrated picture of the year. It’s cute, but is it really an
award-winning film? Just as “Crash” brought
unnecessarily overt attention to racism in Los Angeles,
“Sunshine” softly criticizes the SoCal lifestyle
through the eyes of a dysfunctional, quirky American family.
“Crash” probably won because of its L.A. setting.
“Sunshine” presents a critique of Southern California.
Apparently, we just like to hear about ourselves.
OUT: James Blunt
IN: James Bond
2006 was a monster year for pop singer James Blunt, who
coincidentally is the worst musician … ever. With a raspy,
affected voice and lyrics that could’ve been written by
anyone about anything, Blunt is a singer/songwriter parody, and a
pretty embarrassing one at that. While he’s got pretty-boy
good looks, this year, it’s time for a real man: James Bond
is back and licensed to kill in 2007. With Daniel Craig
rejuvenating the beloved film franchise in “Casino
Royale,” we can look forward to a new era of being shaken,
not stirred.
OUT: YouTube
IN: Inner tubes
Everybody knows how this Web 2.0 stuff works: It’s cool
until The Man drops a few billion dollars for it and ruins
everything. With people abandoning MySpace for Facebook, the
Google-owned YouTube seems next on the list of one-time online
sensations. But in 2007, people will be avoiding the rush, heading
out to the pool and the beach without their camera phones. Float
on, folks.
OUT: Angry comic book fanboys
IN: Angry Transformers fanboys
The days of screaming bloody murder over Peter Parker’s
organic web shooters and Wolverine’s lack of yellow spandex
on the silver screen have long passed. In 2007, the most vocal
group of angry nerds will be hardcore fans of the
“Transformers,” which is being adapted into a
big-budget blockbuster by much-maligned director Michael Bay. Fans
have filled Internet message boards with stunning vitriol,
referring to the project as “Bayformers” and
practically speaking in demonic tongues about Optimus Prime being
the wrong type of truck and having flames painted on him. Of
course, just like with the comic book movies, the angry nerds
can’t escape one simple fact: They’ll all be in line on
opening day.
Blurbs compiled by the Arts & Entertainment
editors.