You never forget your first time, no matter how blurred your
vision was by the end of the night. It kind of sticks with you
among all those other firsts and lasts burned into your memory
banks.
The first college party I went to was in the UCSB-adjacent party
town of Isla Vista. I remember feeling like I had just found some
kind of underage booze-hound’s mecca.
There was free-flowing keg beer, there were beautiful women, and
I felt a strange sense of belonging. All around me there was a sea
of red plastic cups dipping and swaying as drunk students from all
different backgrounds rocked out to the sounds of a local band
playing a live set through crackling distorted speakers. It was a
beautiful experience, perhaps one that will never be equaled, at
least not in the lackluster party environment of UCLA.
Maybe I’ve become a nostalgic old man in my lingering
fifth year of college life, but the scene just doesn’t feel
the same anymore. Back in those Isla Vista days, I was welcomed at
every party, and the keg tap was always passed in my direction when
I needed it the most. The plastic cups were free and the people
were welcoming, no matter who you were. It wasn’t because I
was cooler back then or because I knew more people, but it was just
a different scene.
When I transferred here to UCLA, I was certainly disappointed
with the lack of drunken debauchery going on in Westwood. Sure,
there are parties, but they are largely fraternity parties, and
these exclusionary groups tend to throw ““ you guessed it
““ exclusionary parties. The guest at these events has only
two options: You can either be a frat boy or a pretty girl
(preferably in a short skirt).
At any of these parties, there will inevitably be some
megalomaniac standing at the door, ready to rebuff you if you
don’t seem cool enough or don’t know the right people
““ and rest assured, he will rub it in your face. Like
territorial beasts, these guys growl at outsiders who get too close
to their booze reserves or their women.
But what is really going on here? What’s the point of all
this?
Manufacturing elitism ““ that’s what I like to call
it. They know they have the best (or at times, the only) party in
town, and they use that fact to create some kind of illusion of
supremacy through the systematic turning away of all male
outsiders.
If the people throwing these parties keep barring others from
entry, they create the impression that everyone inside is
incredibly cool ““ and image is very important. Then, more
women will come, and women are always welcome.
I try not to believe that all these frats refuse to let
outsiders in, just to be malicious, or because they are
cool-mongers, trying to pack their party with only the hippest of
the hip. In fact, in some strange sense, this whole process is
really all about the women, and not about the outsiders at all.
When a woman is let into one of these parties, she may feel
lucky to be among these frat-tastic members of the self-proclaimed
uber-elite. Subsequently, she might feel like she owes them
something for letting her in, and with alcohol flowing and dance
moves being relegated to grinding, well, you see where this is
going.
On one hand, I want to warn all you female party-goers to be
careful and not to let yourself fall into a situation you
don’t want to be in. On the other hand, I think that you love
it. You eat it up. You put on your shortest skirt and stomp down
Levering Avenue in your spiked heels, soliciting the stares of
booze-providing party hosts. You play right into their games,
garnering attention, elite party status and free drinks.
Its not really your fault, ladies. In fact, I don’t really
think I can legitimately place the blame on anyone. I just think
you should at least be aware of how this system works and where you
fit in. It’s not that women cause the problem, but they
certainly add fuel to the fire.
To be honest, I don’t like these frat parties much, even
when I can get in. I would much rather be at a bar or at my place
with a few close friends, avoiding long keg lines, lukewarm beer
and territorial stares.
Still, I do think that everyone should have the option to attend
if they want to. Its all about party karma: If you don’t let
people in your party, at some point it will catch up to you. So,
lets try to open up these exclusionary lines. Your frat house
isn’t the new Studio 54; loosen up a bit.
I doubt I can change this exclusionary system with the words of
this column, no matter how harsh. Women will continue to pimp their
sexuality for attention and free booze. Frat- party politics will
continue to dominate the party scene, and non-Greek affiliated UCLA
students will never be on the list.
The only real solution that I can see is to rise against the
manufactured elitism of frats and form an egalitarian society of
collegiate party-goers where everyone is welcome. Reciprocity is
key and equality is a necessity.
So, someone, please take charge. Until then, I’ll be at my
local dive bar, reminiscing about the good old days.