Two words my Latin teacher purposely forgot to teach me ““
cunnilingus and fellatio. When Kinsey wrote his infamous reports in
the ’50s, he stated that 10 percent of men had performed
cunnilingus and 19.1 percent of women had executed fellatio prior
to being confined in wedlock.
The stats seem to have changed a little for Generation Y (born
between 1981 and 1995).
According to a 2003 study conducted by Kaiser Family Foundation,
over 30 percent of teenagers engage in oral sex. This study would
include most first-year and second-year undergrads here at
UCLA.
And it doesn’t end with the stats.
There have been reports of 12-year-olds engaging in oral sex and
teenagers throwing oral-sex parties. These can get creative.
At some, boys line up in trains to wait their turn to be
serviced by a girl. “Rainbow parties” consist of each
girl wearing a different color lipstick and the guys try to get a
ring of every color before the end of the night. And lastly, there
are “chicken head parties,” where girls perform
fellatio on guys at the same time, so that their heads bob like
chickens.
Oral sex has even become a bar mitzvah gift ““ it’s
given under the table during the reception. One caterer was
actually asked to shorten the tablecloths in order to prevent these
stealthy capers.
While there are no clear statistics on how often these
“parties” occur, it’s obvious that oral sex is
more common for our generation than it was in the past. And from
the anecdotes, it seems that fellatio is much more common than
cunnilingus.
There are several theories to explain this so-called oral sex
epidemic.
The same study done by Kaiser Family Foundation found that 33
percent of girls between 15 and 17 practice oral sex in order to
avoid intercourse, and 39 percent of both girls and guys of that
age believe oral sex is safer than intercourse.
Just to clarify, chlamydia, human papillomavirus, gonorrhea,
herpes and possibly even HIV can be transmitted during oral sex
(yes, it is possible to get AIDS from oral sex). This is why
it’s a good idea to use condoms and dental dams unless you
know your partner really well.
Condoms come in a variety of flavors for this single purpose.
And as many of you probably know, dental dams can also be made out
of condoms. You just have to unroll it, cut off the tip, and cut up
one side. Aren’t scissors wonderful?
While this misconception about oral sex could be one reason why
our generation is more relaxed about oral sex, it also has to do
with our attitude toward it. A lot of parents express the concern
that we don’t understand that oral sex is actually sex. While
they consider oral sex to be as intimate, or even more intimate,
than intercourse, they think we don’t understand this
concept.
Their solution is often to enforce in teens the idea that oral
sex is sex, and that practicing it is a form of losing your
virginity.
But others have taken a different approach.
Fox News went so far as to blame former President Bill Clinton
for the so-called epidemic. This came from the idea that
Clinton’s statement, “I did not have sexual relations
with that woman,” gave the impression that oral sex is not
included in the definition of sexual relations. Polls later showed
that the majority of the American population believes in this
distinction.
Nora Gelperin from Planned Parenthood has taken a different
approach. She started a workshop about oral sex and teens that she
gives to professionals around the country. These workshops have
been successful enough to earn Gelperin the title “Oral Sex
Lady.”
The workshops teach professionals how to properly educate teens
about oral sex. According to the Oral Sex Lady, “We must not
forget that the desire of early adolescents to feel sexual pleasure
is normal and natural and should be celebrated, not
censored.”
Gelperin says that educators need to consider the possible
reasons teens are engaging in oral sex, and should ask teens to
reflect on their own moral beliefs and question them about their
opinions on oral sex. This will not only provide them with a place
to openly discuss their views, but also provide the older
generation with accurate information on why Generation Y is so
relaxed about oral sex.
While it’s true that Generation Y is engaging in oral sex,
the idea that all young adults regularly give head is a
stereotype.
Openly discussing the topic and not trying to force perceptions
on people will help to disintegrate this pigeonhole idea and help
members of Generation Y become safer in their sexual endeavors.
Monica Lewinsky is a graduate of Lewis and Clark College. If
you think that’s as funny as Lara does, e-mail her at
lloewenstein@media.ucla.edu.