Well … hmmm. Where exactly do you go from here?
Down? No, you certainly can’t go down.
Not when you’ve just lost to a team that had never before
defeated you in the history of Pauley Pavilion.
Not when you’ve lost six straight games in a season that
once seemed to hold so much promise.
Not when you went out and played without any real semblance of
passion, heart or motivation in a game that was essentially the
must-win of all must-wins.
No, this is it. This is the bottom floor on the elevator of
misery. There’s really no reason to watch these Bruins play
another game this season.
Stay inside. Do some homework. Drink some beer. Play Snood.
But please, whatever you do, just stay away from Pauley
Pavilion. I implore you.
I’m not kidding. Any self-respecting human being would not
want to subject themselves to what goes on inside that place.
For those of you who had the tremendous foresight to stay away
from Pauley last night, knowing that the game wasn’t on
television, you are gods among men as far as I am concerned.
But losing does breed some interesting sights.
Sitting above the press box was a man with a brown paper bag
over his head. And as journalists know, nothing screams credibility
like a man with a paper bag over his head.
“I’m not giving you my name. I’m not that
stupid,” paper-bag man said, without even being asked a
question.
But, sir, why are you wearing a paper bag on your head?
“Because we’ve been playing like shit the last five
games.”
Make that six. And counting.
Paper bag man talked honestly about the woes of the Bruins,
their inability to shoot the basketball, their total offensive
ineptitude, and the incredibly apparent lack of passion. Paper-bag
man was pissed, and rightly so. His paper bag said
“BRUINS,” but the “B” was crossed out.
That’s essentially the point this season has entered.
It wasn’t so long ago that this team began the Pac-10
season 5-0. This was a season of hope. It was supposed to be
different from last year.
Now, however, last year’s habit of losing has once again
reared its ugly head. Losing, and losing, and losing. It
hasn’t yet approached Steve Lavin’s nine straight
defeats, but even Lavin beat Washington State in Pauley.
“Six in a row is just really, really hard,” coach
Ben Howland said.
No kidding. It’s hard on everyone associated with UCLA.
It’s hard on the Athletic Department. It’s hard on
alumni. And it’s especially hard on the students.
With 7:55 to play and the clock stopped for a time-out, the UCLA
band began to play the Rolling Stones’
“Satisfaction.”
And it just seemed so apt. It seems as though the Bruins really
can’t get no satisfaction. Fans have had just as much
difficulty latching onto this team as Michael Fey has had catching
the basketball. There’s no personality, no drive, nothing
really compelling to embrace.
What happened in the game Thursday night? I don’t really
remember. It was just really bad basketball. There was no flow or
continuity. It was boring, and boring basketball is never fun to
watch.
You know there’s something seriously rotten in the state
of Westwood when the UCLA student section is excited to be down by
(only) six points with five minutes to play. Against Washington
State. In Pauley Pavilion.
Sometimes you reach a point where it’s just not possible
to go any lower, and that point has arrived.
Oh yeah, and John Hoffart shaved his head. That was kind of
cute.
Regan thinks those paper towel sensor things are cool. He
also thinks the Bruins are done. E-mail him at
dregan@media.ucla.edu.