Student athletes at UCLA are just like you and me: They have to
eat. When they get hungry, they don’t have people chew their
food for them. This means that they must go to the supermarket,
just like I do.
But one thing I have always wondered is, what kind of foodstuffs
do these athletes purchase? Surely not the veal chops and Velveeta
you will find in my shopping cart. With my curiosity at an all-time
high, I was lucky enough to find Chelsea Murray and Krissy Tinney,
two seniors on the No.11 UCLA women’s swimming team.
They agreed to meet me at Whole Foods last week. This was the
deal: I would provide the swimmers with my groceries list, and they
could pick out the food I would purchase. If Chelsea and Krissy saw
anything else they liked in supermarket, they could throw that in
the cart, too.
As I waited for them outside Whole Foods, I thought about
swimming. I still swim with floaties, while co-team captain Krissy
competes in the freestyle and Chelsea does the butterfly and the
individual medley.
They arrived on their Honda Elite scooters and quickly
dismounted. As they approached me, I knew for sure that the whole
scene looked like a weird drug deal. I can just imagine a bystander
remarking, “What are those athletic, tall women doing with
that drug dealer with the asymmetrical haircut?” I’m
surprised it wasn’t all over the message boards. Chelsea and
Krissy had brought a friend ““ Colleen Barnett of the UC Santa
Barbara swim team. I’m positive their philosophy was safety
in numbers. We exchanged pleasantries and grabbed a cart.
We had decided against Ralph’s because we were supporting
the striking workers there, but let’s just say that Whole
Foods is not our favorite supermarket.
We first attacked the produce section, breezing past exotic
fruits and vegetables.
“Chelsea, I want those apricots ripe, darn it. No slacking
Krissy ““Â if those tomatoes aren’t plump
you’ll owe me some pushups,” I said, foaming at the
mouth.
We strolled through the aisles, bobbing our heads to the Paula
Abdul that was piped-in throughout the store, until we ran into
Daily Bruin editor in chief Kelly Rayburn.
Rayburn was buying some organic beer.
Anyway, I’m sure Rayburn was surprised to see me with
three blondes. This is a transcript of our conversation.
DM: What are you doing?
KR: I am just buying some beer and not crossing the picket
line.
DM: Organic beer?
KR: Yep.
(Note: in a press release dated November 5, Rayburn denied
purchasing organic beer. “It was Coors Light, liar,”
the statement read.)
When you shop at Whole Foods, you miss out on many name-brand
provisions. For example, in the cereal aisle, there were no Cocoa
Puffs to be found, and I was forced to purchase some sort of
organic cereal. Chelsea picked out Peanut Butter Panda Puffs
because the pandas on the box were cute. Man, this cereal
isn’t cute. It’s too crunchy, and I can’t eat it
while I watch television because the crunching makes it impossible
to hear Kelly Ripa and Regis.
By this time, Chelsea, Krissy and I were having so much fun; we
were like old friends. You know, talking about our significant
others and Muenster and Camembert cheeses. I started to wonder,
does the swim team build unity through group grocery shopping like
this?
“No, the team never goes on group trips to the supermarket
for solidarity,” Krissy said. “Everyone has such
different tastes.”
However, she did reveal one of the team’s culinary bonding
events.
“As a team we make icing and eat it. We also make cookie
dough from scratch and eat it and then make cookies with the
leftover dough,” Krissy said.
My roommates and I do the same thing (while listening to the
“Risky Business” soundtrack).
Finally, while in the checkout line, the girls lamented Whole
Foods’ poor assortment of magazines. Who wants to read Yoga
Journal when you can read National Enquirer? So the total came out
to $62.
It was $62 of life-sustaining food, but more importantly it was
$62 of fun.
E-mail Miller at dmiller@media.ucla.edu to discuss Duran
Duran.