Sept. 16, 2003 ““ a date that will live in infamy. It was
on this day that the Los Angeles City Council, in a 13-0 decision,
brought lap dancing to a bumping and grinding halt.
Just as former gubernatorial hopeful Mary Carey was pledging to
make lap dances tax deductible, the City Council banned the lap
dance from strippers’ repertoires. Direct tipping and VIP
rooms were also outlawed ““ where the shows could get so
intimate that the girls would only be able to reveal more of
themselves through an x-ray. The city was clearly thinking with
their penal codes that Tuesday.
In response, strip club managers, employees and sympathizers
have gathered on Bruin Walk and elsewhere collecting signatures of
registered Los Angeles County voters to put an initiative on the
ballot to overturn the new law. You might be asking yourself:
“Should I put my John Hancock down for these
strippers?” In my humble opinion, yes, yes you should!
This is America ““ land of the free cover charge and home
of the risqué. The cornerstone to our Bill of Rights is the
right to a free press and these women should be free to press their
pips and pops against any customer coming through the door. To
reject their pleas for help is not only unsympathetic, it is
un-American.
Immediately, your heart must go out to these exotic dancers.
Without hundreds of $1 bills tucked into their thongs night after
night, how will these poor girls keep on paying for medical school?
For those brave women who dare take the law into their own hands
and continue to straddle their moneymakers, the consequences can be
stiff. Penalties for violating the new ordinance can be as high as
six months in jail and $2,500 in fines. It would be a shame to see
these young entertainers dancing behind bars rather than on top of
them.
Representing many of the gentlemen’s clubs is attorney
Roger Jon Diamond. (Side note ““ How perfect is that name for
someone who represents strip clubs?) Whether he is making a hefty
payday off this case or simply taking it pro boner, Diamond will
challenge the law and try and overturn it before a vote becomes
necessary. Should the stripping industry lose its fight against the
new ordinance, it will need to look for new ideas to revive
business.
One solution may be for patrons to come to the clubs dressed as
Santa Claus. That way a stripper can hop on Santa’s knee,
tell him what she wants for Christmas and explain why she was
naughty this year. What this young woman wants probably will not be
made at the North Pole, so Santa will have to slip her $50 so she
can just pick it up herself.
We must be clear where we stand on the lap dance issue. We
cannot beat around the bush. Supporters of the ban say strip clubs
can promote prostitution and drugs. Politics can do the same thing
““ but nobody’s voting to break up city councils. Many
Americans may not approve of clubs where nudity and sexuality are
as abundant as peanuts and buffalo wings. However, these same
people probably salute the principles of freedom and individualism
that have made this country the amazing place it is.
This is a matter of liberty ““ not just sex. So if someone
comes up and asks you to sign a petition for the lap dancers, by
all means, sign it. Put the initiative on the ballot and let the
people decide. Give these ladies the chance to leave their poles
and go to the polls.
Pfohl is a fourth-year history and political science
student. E-mail him at jpfohl@media.ucla.edu.