Tales of Pac-10 Webster’s games

Not that you care or anything, but let me clear this much up
before we get into this week’s Pac-10 morsels.

Yes, the second half of last Wednesday’s Pac-10 column
came curiously disguised as completely blank space.

And no, it’s not because I (1) gave up and just said the
hell with it or (b) passed out on the keyboard. Had the latter
happened, the space would have read
“dffffffffffffffffffff” instead of being blank, not
that I’ve passed out on a keyboard or anything.

No, from what I understand, it was some kind of printing error,
and you can rest assured that internal discipline here at this fine
newspaper rivals that of late eighteenth-century France.

Three high-ranking Daily Bruin officials are headed to the
guillotine, and I am currently in the process of drafting articles
of impeachment against sports editor J.P. Hoornstra.

It’s not like this is on the level of the 18-and-a-half
minute gap in the Watergate tapes. In fact, if you go to the Web
site at dailybruin.ucla.edu to see the column in its entirety,
you’ll probably be underwhelmed.

Imagine finding those missing 18-and-a-half minutes, only to
discover it was just part of Nixon’s personal Blue Oyster
Cult collection. It’s kind of like that.

Not that you care or anything.

Now that’s out of the way …

One thing mentioned in the phantom 645 words from last Wednesday
was Cal’s 19-game losing streak to Washington.

Well, the Bears continue to surprise, pulling out a 34-27 upset
of the Huskies that not only obliterated the losing streak, but
also brought Washington’s 17-game home winning streak to an
end.

What’s more, the Bears, 1-10 a year ago, are now 4-2 and
would be only two wins away from bowl eligibility if not for NCAA
probation. It has been a turnaround of proportions rarely seen,
even in the parity-rich Pac-10.

Really the only way to put things into perspective is a Tony
Danza analogy.

Imagine Steven Spielberg looking for a lead actor in his next
blockbuster flick and thinking, “hmmm … Cruise, Clooney,
Gibson, no … this role is pure Danza.”

We’re not giving the Oscar to Cal just yet, but we do see
a good chance for a win over Stanford for the first time in
years.

No wonder Bear fans are anxiously awaiting the results of a
suddenly important appeal to the NCAA.

A Webster’s Game

Certain games in a football season, whether they seem like it at
the time or not, are Webster’s Games. They have nothing to do
with lovable pint-sized actor Emmanuel Lewis, though I think
it’s safe to say I’m in the majority in saying that
show needs to be brought back on reruns.

No, they are defining games, the kinds of contests that either
help vault a team to a New Year’s Day bowl game or become
“where it all went wrong.”

For UCLA and No. 7 Oregon, last year’s 21-20 Duck win was
the very “definition” (sorry) of a Webster’s
Game.

The Bruins, reeling from two straight losses, came up just short
on a Chris Griffith field goal and skidded to 7-4, while Oregon
wound up No. 2 in the country.

It’s our game of the week (12:30 p.m., ABC, regional), and
a UCLA win would not only make the Bruins a legit conference
contender, but also slap Oregon with a reality check they’ve
yet to get.

Elsewhere in the Pac-10

Arizona (3-2) at No. 22 Washington (3-2), 12:30 p.m.

No. 12 Washington State (5-1) at Stanford (1-3), 2:00 p.m.

Cal (4-2) at No. 20 USC (3-2), 3:30 p.m., FSN (national)

Oregon State (4-2) at Arizona State (4-2), 6:00 p.m.

Wait, one last thing …

Seven conference schools rank in the Top 25 in passing
efficiency. How pass-happy is the Pac-10?

Cory Paus’ career performance last week and outstanding
145.0 rating are only good enough for sixth place among Pac-10
QBs.

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