Donald, Double can guide you to summer fun

Anthony Bromberg
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This is our life, the collective life of the UCLA student body:
we live sheltered in Westwood, hurrying to and fro, worrying,
stressing and taking for granted the mecca of entertainment
possibilities that the city around us is.

To counteract this distressing phenomenon, introduce yourself to
our two new heros, superheros if you will ““ yes, a dynamic
duo even, we’ll call them Donald and Double, or D and D for
short. First, understand that this dynamic duo doesn’t attend
UCLA. In fact, they go to an Ivy League university we’ll call
for our purposes “Princeton.” At
“Princeton” they play football, go to class and
complain like regular students. Now this next part is where the
brilliant insight comes in, and where we ““ the pedestrian
students of our own esteemed university ““ can learn
something, to take advantage of what is around you.

During the course of their last humble mild-mannered year at
“Princeton,” D and D put their East Coast heads
together and came to one conclusion: they should head West for the
summer. So, as their summer started to blossom with California
dreams and a disdain for responsibility, the pair set out across
the country and landed in Los Angeles on Landfair Avenue, the
epicenter of the UCLA party scene. Little did they imagine the
immediate effect this would have on them. Leaving their own school
and heading out to the bright sun of ours had nearly the same
effect on them as the yellow sun of our planet had on
Krypton’s Kal-El, or Superman. In Los Angeles D and D found
themselves no mere mortal students of a constricting university.
Instead they were suddenly commanders of cool, finders of fun and
hipsters of hype.

You may be asking yourself what the extent of their powers are
““ a legitimate question, but one impossible to answer in this
humble first episode in the epic chronicles of D and D. Suffice to
say for now that these two brilliant young men immediately
recognized the place we live in as a celebrity-filled land of
entertainment. Oh, they saw their Candyland and chose not to
stress, but to frolic in the Candy Castle. They took and continued
to take and rip apart the glories you and I bypass daily without
appreciation.

A little more background on our heroes now, before we entertain
musings about their first adventure. D and D have nothing to do
this summer. Literally, they have no jobs, no classes and no
responsibilities except to take some Creatine and work out from
time to time to stay in football shape. This lack of a schedule and
tasks hanging over their heads facilitates their fun adventures, as
does their strict adherence to the “where there’s a
will there’s a way” philosophy. D and D are relatively
buff, good-looking, charming young men, with biting senses of humor
and for now that’s all you really need to know.

If only some greater hand than my own will help guide my words
to be worthy of these two illustrious heroes, I’ll begin to
tell you the true stories and real adventures behind the mythic
tandem of D and D.

Not long ago from a place probably not far from where you are
right now, two unassuming young men just in from LAX were moving
into their subletted apartment on Landfair. After a hard
day’s work the two collapsed into their newly installed plush
chairs and sighed. What to do, oh what to do?

A lightbulb then went off over their collectively expensive
brains, and they got up to go outside. Thus began Donald and
Double’s transformation into the dynamic duo of D and D, who
impose themselves and their unique brand of fun on the
entertainment capital of the world. And with that, your humble
notetaker is out of space, and I didn’t even get to tell you
of the story of D and D and the film premieres. So make sure to
stay tuned with your ears open, your eyes to the ground and your
finger on the page ““ their exploits may come your way.

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