ONLINE EXTRA: Tips for a great spring break

  David Burke Burke is a third-year
English and political science student. E-mail him at dburke@media.ucla.edu.
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Winter quarter is quickly coming to an end and you all know what
that means ““ spring break! That’s right. MTV’s
annual holiday is almost upon us. This means images of wet T-shirt
contests will be dancing in your head while “The Thong
Song” serenades your ears.

While I’ll be making the most of my spring break in a
place with “muchas senoritas,” I know that many of you
will not take advantage of your time off. Guys, many of you will
have your mom wait on you hand and foot while you gorge yourself
watching the NCAA Tournament on ESPN. Girls, many of you will play
with your Barbie dolls while you braid each other’s hair (I
actually don’t know what girls do to be lazy, sorry).

But for all of you en route to a lazy break, don’t worry.
I am here to help. Below, I have offered three viable suggestions
for a great spring break. Before you discount what I’m about
to say, don’t forget you only get four of these breaks in
your entire college career (unless you’re a creepy
fifth-year), so make the most of them. If you don’t,
you’ll have some serious regrets when you become like your
dad and spring break consists of waking up at 6 a.m. to commute to
work.

My first suggestion for spring break merriment is a classic
““ party! Go to Mexico or Florida or the Bahamas and just let
loose. Think of all the benefits. Every time you go to a party or a
club you can sing to yourself: “IIIIIIIIIIII’m coming
up so you better get this party started!” As if that
isn’t enough, you get to reap spring break’s ultimate
benefit ““ “hooking up” with no strings
attached.

Imagine not having to worry about seeing your
“hook-up” on campus the next day, feeling obligated to
call them, or mistakenly hooking up with one of your friends while
drunk. None of this applies during spring break because everyone
“hooking up” with you is in the same boat you’re
in. You can all operate under the implicit understanding that the
whole reason for Spring Break is to have inconsequential
“hook-ups”.

Just don’t forget to bring your brain with you when you
take advantage of spring break’s pretense of raging hormones.
You don’t want to be father or mother to a child who’s
genes come from a University of Nebraska agricultural science
student that you met at Papas and Beer. You have to draw the line
somewhere.

If partying isn’t up your alley, then spending quality
time with your family is also a great idea. I’d like to
stress that lying around your house for a week and trying to set a
record for napping is not quality time. Instead, go places and do
things with your siblings and parents that you’ll fondly
remember. Your family will really appreciate a trip to the museum
or the beach. As we grow older, we see our family less and less, so
don’t just sit around when you do get a chance to go
home.

If you can’t stand your family, a final alternative is to
take a trip with your friends. This trip doesn’t have to be a
party. It can be a mini-vacation or a road trip. Visit Las Vegas or
The Grand Canyon National Park. A week is more than enough time to
go somewhere new. Getting away from your immediate surroundings can
also help you gain more perspective about what we all sometimes
take for granted at UCLA. Sometimes it’s easy to forget that
there is a world outside of our school, so take a trip and see a
different part of the world.

Whatever you do, just don’t look back on your time off and
realize that it sucked because you sat around for a week. But
before you go wild, I want to leave you with these words of advice:
don’t sit around regretting what you didn’t do, but
don’t regret anything that you did either.

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