Tuesday, April 21, 1998
The good, the skinnee and the stumpy
MUSIC: The fashionably goofy riot nrrrds
of 2 Skinnee J’s owe it all
to their mysterious leader,
one A.J. Stumpy Johnson
By Jeremy Engel
Daily Bruin Contributor
The name A.J. Stumpy Johnson rolls off the tongue right along
with the smoothest figures of our time – names like Randy "Sexual
Chocolate" Watson, Minnesota Fats, Gary U.S. Bonds and Screamin’
Jay Hawkins.
They are the kind of fellas who step out of the Cadillac, adjust
their hats, and swagger to the back of the club with a supermodel
on each arm. Men who make things happen each time they snap their
fingers, each time they flash their smile, each time they get
slap-happy and can’t help but say, "Ta-Da!"
When Stumpy strolls into the mix, things heat up, heads start
rollin’, music starts flowin’ and people stand on their tiptoes to
take notice.
So, who is A.J. Stumpy Johnson?
"He’s our owner, manager and spiritual advisor," says Special
J., singer for the rock group 2 Skinnee J’s. "Our inspiration is
not at all musical. It comes from Stumpy."
The members of 2 Skinnee J’s go about their lives as the
obedient drones of Stumpy. They are talented and creative men, but
they have no misunderstanding that Stumpy is in charge.
Stumpy’s association with 2 Skinnee J’s goes back several years,
spanning a band history that involves three albums and 12 former
members. The band’s newest release, "Supermercado," released on the
Mercury-owned Capricorn records, has all the ingredients of a hit.
With a unique hip-hop rock ‘n’ roll sound, catchy melodies, tactful
sampling and peppy vocals from frontmen Special J. and J. Guevara,
"Supermercado" showcases Stumpy’s talent in molding the seven
fashionably goofy members of 2 Skinnee J’s into an impressive
musical entourage with commercial potential.
"The man is really incredible," Special J. says. "He takes 80
percent of our money, but he really does a great job. He’s almost
like George Steinbrenner. He’s like a baseball team manager, and
he’s put the band together over a series of years. He’s ruthless,
and if you don’t perform up to his code, you get fired."
2 Skinnee J’s’ former members usually stick around to work for
Stumpy in other facets of his sprawling business network around the
globe even though they no longer live up to Johnson’s high musical
standards.
"A few of them work for his oil concerns on the west coast,"
Special J. says.
When the band performs live, Stumpy stands on stage with a
cigarette and a beer, screaming bad words and nasty remarks at the
musicians. This method of motivation might make some bands swell
with fear and anxiety, but to 2 Skinnee J’s, it’s part of its
leader’s overall plan and therefore a progressive form of criticism
for the members.
"Stumpy’s a very wise man. He has never justified anything to
anybody," Special J. says.
Stumpy showed wisdom by recruiting Tim Latham, a talented
producer who has worked with rap acts such as A Tribe Called Quest
and De La Soul, to produce "Supermercado." If Stumpy has his way,
the first single off the album, a funked-out guitar-driven rap
melody called "Riot Nrrrd," should bring the band fame and fortune.
The song has enjoyed extensive airplay on college radio stations,
and the video should begin airing on MTV in the upcoming weeks.
"It’s all part of Stumpy’s plan," Special J. says.
Sometimes Stumpy’s plan involves bending the rules a little,
such as the measures he took to get singer J. Guevara, a Montreal
native, into the New York-based band.
"He smuggled me into the country and gave me reconstructive
surgery," J. Guevara says.
In addition to singers Special J. and J. Guevara, 2 Skinnee J’s
is made up of bassist Eddie Eyeball, drummer Andy Action, keyboard
player Steve Spice and guitarist A. Mays.
Those who come into possession of "Supermercado" not only get to
listen to 12 energetic tunes, but they also get to flip through a
colorful 16-page insert that contains photos of band members in
their underwear and elegant images of a hand model with
tiger-striped press-on nails grabbing a cabbage, wielding a
hairbrush, caressing a slice of pie and fondling a light bulb.
There’s even a little picture of the man himself, A.J. Stumpy
Johnson, decked out in a pinstriped suit, pimp daddy hat and gold
chain with a cigarette dangling from his lips.
2 Skinnee J’s members approach their careers with calm and
humble frames of mind traditionally uncharacteristic of rock stars.
They have faith in Stumpy, the man with the plan. They believe that
whatever becomes of their lives and their music will result from
Stumpy’s desires.
"We just want people to love our music," Special J. says.
The band has spent a lot of time playing on the road, and they
hope that "Supermercado" will be successful enough to give them the
opportunity to tour with more well-known acts in the future.
"We’d love to tour with Tom Jones, The Spice Girls, the London
Philharmonic, Marilyn Manson, The Roots or Hanson," Special J.
says. "Unfortunately Tiny Tim passed away, so we can’t go out with
him."
Will 2 Skinnee J’s hit the mainstream with the release of
"Supermercado," catapulting the band into a sphere of superstardom
among the likes of its heroes? Stumpy’s the only one who knows if
they’ll make it big. He has it all mapped out.
Photos courtesy of Capricorn Records
2 Skinnee J’s combine hip-hop, rock and an odd sense of
humor.
A.J. Stumpy Johnson (in the beret) lurks behind all of 2 Skinnee
J’s work.
2 Skinnee J’s are a creative and talented bunch. Strange, but
talented.