Monday, 5/12/97 Confronting, not avoiding issue of sex
Responsibility lies with parents, not society, to regulate explicit
imagery
A few days ago, my friends and I were leisurely strolling
through the Sculpture Garden discussing the many interpretations of
the pieces of art that are located there. The only really strange
thing about the venture was that during sixth week we had time to
leisurely do anything. Well, that’s not completely true. There was
something strange about it: my interpretations of the art. While my
friend, who happens to be an art student, saw angels and clouds
when she looked at abstract pieces, I saw orgies and fallopian
tubes. I don’t know what Freud would say about my explanations of
the pieces. (Actually, I can guess what he would say and it
frightens me.) But the incident got me thinking, so I have a dirty
mind. Doesn’t everybody? I don’t think that I’m extraordinarily
perverse. After all, I’m human and I’m American. And America is a
big, potent, sexual place. I always knew that I’d eventually write
an article about sex. It is one of the few things I know a lot
about, not necessarily from my own experiences but rather from the
education I am subjected to every day just by being awake. Ever
since second grade, when my best friend whispered in my ear what
"hickey" meant (OK, so I was a slow kid), I’ve been barraged by
sexual images. Sometimes I think the ultraconservative Right must
have to literally lock up their children in their churches to try
and protect them from the sexual images out there. They must leave
them there, huddled in the dark, reading from their favorite
scriptures. And even with these extreme measures, the parents can’t
shield their delicate eyes from the images of sex. Have you read
the Bible lately? It can get downright juicy. It’s impossible to
avoid the topic of sex. You walk down the aisle at a drugstore and
there, right in front of you, are pregnancy tests, condoms, HIV
tests and tampons. You listen to the news and the lead story is on
the development of a new orgasm pill. Sex is everywhere. There’s
nowhere you can hide from it. Don’t fret – it’s not an
unexplainable phenomenon. I do have a two-part theory as to why
sexual imagery is so persistent in our society. First of all, all
human beings want sex. It’s in their genes. If we look at humanity
from a scientific rather than a theological point of view, we see
that the reason for our existence is to reproduce. The human body
exists to make more human bodies. Before technology interfered, the
only way to do that was through sex. So if we are attracted to
things that promote sex and reproduction, well that’s just natural.
The second part of my theory deals with why everything we encounter
is tainted with sexual innuendos. One simple explanation: sex
sells. That’s it. This is a capitalistic society. Advertising
perverts, I mean executives, know that it’s in the human nature to
be attracted to sexual images and that’s why every product on the
market, from vacuum cleaners to sodas, incorporates sex in its
advertising. And when nearly every thing or person is an
advertisement for something, it’s easy to see how sex is
inescapable. So that brings me to my next point. Why try to avoid
sexual images? You can’t, believe me. And trying to shelter
children from it is just plain stupid, if not futile and often
counterproductive. Now, I’m not encouraging parents to sign their
children up for membership in Larry Flynt’s fan club, but to try to
say that something is not family material because it has the word
"sex" in the description is ridiculous. I hate to use a cliche (and
you know I will), but is it better for kids to learn about sex from
their friends, whose perceptions are skewed, from movies like
"Showgirls," in which absolutely nothing is real (I mean nothing),
or from their parents? I’m not going to get into all that rhetoric
about how sexuality is beautiful and it should be celebrated.
Although I do believe that to an extent, I accept the fact that
others don’t, and to them sexuality is something that should be
very personal and private. I respect that view also and can see
some beauty in it. But the reality is that sexuality isn’t private.
Intimacy is not so intimate. Ignoring it won’t make it go away and
trying to censor it can threaten a lot more than some delicate
natures and personal preferences. There are a lot of gratuitous
sexual images out there, and I am very supportive of parents
regulating, let me repeat the word, regulating, the exposure that
their children have to it. But regulating should not mean
sheltering. Don’t try to stamp out every sexual image out there and
don’t attack those images that aren’t explicit in nature. People
need to stop worrying about their kids watching "Ellen" (a show in
which all relationships are chronically platonic) and start
worrying about their kids watching "Melrose Place," a show in which
you’d be lucky if all the characters were doing was just having
sex. People need to focus on the real images out there that can
wrongly influence children, and the only way to do that is to stop
trying to randomly censor or ignore sexual images in society. And
people need to stop hiding from sex. You’d have better luck hiding
from yourself. Kester is a first-year undeclared student. Alicia
Kester